and then our exile

MERRY EID (TWO DAYS LATE)! AND HAPPY-DAY TO YOU ALL! IT IS SNOW OUTSIDE SPARKLING AND WHITE AND BLUE AND COLD AND BEAUTIFUL!!
The CIC says we should go out and give food to the Kuffar on this day.
Ha.
No actually, I'm just making fun. I do think it's a good idea.

One thing I *will* say about my ten days is that from the moment I entered the doors of the masjid, each and every time I slept (with perhaps two exceptions) I was overwhelmed by dreams of every hue. One after another.

Otherwise, my time was spent in clearly-allocated functions; there was little wastage of time relative to the home-life, as it was spent either in food, in sleep, in various miscellany related to toiletry, in discussions, reading, writing or in various forms of worship. Put plainly, it offered a glimpse at a lifestyle far above, one radiating Truth...
Those who came, as individuals, were examples of those I aspire to join. As a whole, though, the MCE this year was somewhat...dead, in comparison to previous: last year, with Shaikh Jihad, it used to be packed for taraweeh and with a good fifty people for tahajjud; this year, we are lucky if we have three rows of taraweeh-ers, and lucky if six people show up for tahajjud. ^_^

Sunday/10.23pm/: Things occur wild and marvelous, brilliant beyond the mortal ken, but we perceive them not. In fact, we're not even remotely aware of their existence (most of the time) and when we are, we hastily retreat--much as one refrains from looking directly at the sun. Is this possible? That Ramadan, which I've been awaiting for so long even if unconsciously as an avenue to True Belief, to Reality, to things mighty and glorious contending on the path to *the* Mighty, *the* Glorious, as a month wherein my knowledge of mySelf, of God, of all...would exponentially increase by virtue of the sheer barakah intimated with those who strive within; also as a means to reaffirm myself and as a means to guiding all, leading the wayward impulses of my soul back to the Only Way; a month wherein I would remember death, remember life, see all in retrospect, read Qur'an, align my worldview with that of the Sunnah, work towards an application of the vision of Islam in the personal and social spheres of my impatient periphary, implement the principles I sometimes care to profess, and, generally, Be... ...that all this was scattered along the wayside, an unavoidable consequence of false prioritizing and sheer wastage and jumbled forethought, left as vague but good intentions bearing no fruit? That now, having lived through these thirty days, they will not return except on a Day they will haunt me and indeed condemn me for my blatent vices? Nothing is neutral--Ramadan is nearly over--only 17 blessed hours left. How will I spend them? After leaving most of the last 28 days as one asleep, how shall I conduct myself with this last?