and then our exile

i left Damascus a month ago today. it is another world, to live in. another way of life entirely.

i used to stare blankly when people would call a professor a praaf. then i stopped staring blankly, and would smile and nod. now i am back to the staring blankly.

a few nights ago i kept repeatedly waking up, between many dreams. in one of those i returned to Shaam, walking across a farmer's field, brisk air against my face and furrows in the earth below. i stretched and smiled of joy, and zacharia picked dates off a tree.

the past month, then, has taught me things about the nature of different things, about the ways life works. the enlightenment descends, greet it with such sweeping terrible emotion.